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Like vs Love...

Peace to the folk. I hope you're well. After my wife and I were on "Black Love", a brother asked me what was the key to a successful marriage. I felt a bit pressured in the situation, not because he was pressuring me in any way, but because the question itself is pressure. The expectation is that it can be answered with the same ease and simplicity in which it is asked. Impossible. No one person, no one couple, no one thousand couples, for that matter, can set anyone on a path to a successful relationship. All any of us can do is talk about what worked for us, period. As attentive listeners, we can hope to gain some level of insight from another's experiences, and then apply that insight to our own circumstance if we can.

There is no broad "right path", no gurus, no experts, just decided participants willing to figure it out, whatever "it" may be. By the way, I never refer to her as "my wife" unless it's in a structured setting such as this. Personally, I call her "Babe", always delivering with the "b" on the end. Older gentleman I used to work with always referred to his wife as "the wife", which always felt so unattached and distant to me. Who knows, I could be totally wrong, but I don't ever want the closeness of me and "ole girl" to ever be in doubt. By the way, Sistas, if your man's friends don't know you as "ole girl", you ain't the one. I did't make the rules, sis, I just rock with them. Anyway, "Like vs "Love", let's go...

It is not my intent to slight “Love”. Abstract as it is, it is still the measure of a successful relationship, at least in most people’s minds. Ha! Allow me a little room here because I am in a successful relationship, just short of twenty years in fact. Two kids, one in college, the other on the precipice of having a four day school week, but that’s another blog for another day. Let me get back to why we’re here: “Like vs. Love”

She just slid by and kissed me, as she saunters off singing some love song under her breath.

It’s peace where I live. You know why? You want to know the secret? It’s not a book. Truth is, it's not even a secret, and its actually something that we do innately as human beings from the time we are aware of ourselves…gravitating towards who and what we like. “Like” has no ambiguity. Either you like someone or you don’t. It can’t be conned, coxed, or clouded in any way; all elements, pointedly, that “Love” can fall victim to.

I like my wife, man. That’s it. Oh, and she likes me. Voila. Word to E-40. The truest difference between “Like” and “Love” is control. You can never lose control of “like”, but you can absolutely lose control of “love”, not to mention it has the misfortune of being subject to the idea and action of waining. Damn. “LIke”, 2-0. Listen, I’m not suggesting that one can exist without the other, they work in tandem, but one does have more importance if the relationship is one of those forevers.

To be clear, love and like are needed for a successful relationship, but in totally different ways. "Love", for its part, is a strong emotional bond that connects two people and is characterized by feelings of warmth, affection, and commitment. "Like", on the other hand, refers to the positive feelings and attitudes that one has towards another person. While love is often considered to be the foundation of a long-term relationship, like is likely more important because it is what keeps the relationship strong and healthy over time. When we first fall in love, our focus is often on the things we love about the other person. However, as time passes and the so-called honeymoon phase ends, the things that were once charming and endearing may become annoying or bothersome. This is where like stands and delivers. If two people truly like each other, they will be able to overlook these minor issues and focus on the things that they appreciate about one another.

In a long-term relationship, like is more important than love because it is the glue that holds the relationship together. Love can and will evolve over time, but if two people truly like each other, they will be able to work through the challenges and difficulties that inevitably arise in any relationship. They will also be more likely to support each other in their personal growth and development, which is essential for a lasting and fulfilling relationship. When two people truly like each other, they are more likely to be able to navigate disagreements and conflicts without allowing them to become toxic to the relationship.

When you truly appreciate the person you are with, you can see them as an individual with their own thoughts, feelings, and perspectives, rather than viewing them as an extension of yourself. This allows for greater empathy, understanding, and the ability to compromise. Humans disagree, such is life, but if you truly like each other you are able to compartmentalize the specific issue, focus on it alone without it spilling into any other aspect of your life or growing into a bigger issue because it is left to fester malcontent. Truly liking each other allows you to get back to what’s good faster.

Here are five reasons why liking your mate leads to a greater quality of life:

  1. Greater understanding and empathy: When you genuinely like someone, you are more likely to be able to see things from their perspective and understand where they're coming from. This leads to greater empathy and understanding in the relationship.

  2. Increased ability to compromise: When you truly like someone, you are more likely to be able to compromise and find middle ground in disagreements, rather than becoming entrenched in your own position.

  3. More accepting of flaws and imperfections: When you like someone, you are more likely to be able to accept them for who they are, with all their flaws and imperfections. This leads to a more realistic and accepting view of the relationship.

  4. Greater ability to navigate conflicts: When you like someone, you are more likely to be able to navigate conflicts and disagreements without allowing them to become toxic to the relationship. This leads to a healthier and more stable relationship.

  5. Increased sense of intimacy and companionship: When you truly like someone, you will experience a deeper sense of intimacy and companionship. This leads to a more fulfilling and satisfying relationship.

In summary, while love is important in a relationship, it's important to remember that like is what keeps the relationship strong and healthy over time. A relationship built on genuine like, mutual respect, and shared values will be more likely to last, grow and flourish, and will be able to navigate disagreements and conflicts in a healthy and constructive way. It can also lead to a greater quality of life for both partners in the relationship. Again, I am no expert, just a dude living in happiness. I hope you found some value here. One Love

Signed, Old Head Energy



*Online shoppers only

Peace. If you shop online, here's a link for you...

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*smirk the world

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